Tuesday, January 6, 2009

5 Films Your Mom Doesn't Want You To See

Remember when you were little and your parents used to watch their "grown-up" movies and they'd send you to bed early so you wouldn't see it? And remember how you used to sneak back into the living room anyway so you could catch a glimpse of said black-listed film? Well these films are just like that. No matter how old you get, you're mom would definitely be disappointed if she ever caught you watching these films.

#5 Imprint
Plot: In the late 19th century, an American travels to Japan to find the woman he loved and lost-- a prostitute from a strange island. What he finds on the island of whores and demons is nothing short of terrifying and shocking.
Why It's Bad, Bad, Bad: This movie has everything it takes to be a "bad" movie-- rape, prostitution, violence, abortion, incest, torture, bad accents, and then some. A friend of mine suggested it to me as "one of the freakiest movies" he'd ever seen. Lemme tell you folks, "freaky" doesn't even begin to cover it.
Mother's Shame Factor: On a scale of one to ten, we'll say a seven.

#4 Blue Velvet
Plot: When a young man finds a severed ear in a field in his home town, the simple lacerated human appendage launches a mystery that is filled with dark secrets.
Why It's Bad, Bad, Bad: This throwback to the 50's noir films was originally called depraved, dark, vulgar, and silly. With its raw displays of human psychoses and sexual flaws, the film was forever condemned as a "smart, dirty movie."
Mother's Shame Factor: Six

#3 Natural Born Killers
Plot: Mickey and Mallory are in love. In fact they do everything together. This includes going on a cross-country killing spree that ends up making them into national celebrities.
Why It's Bad, Bad, Bad: This is one of my particular favorites on this list. The amount of violence in this film is earth-shattering. Bodies drop every single scene. In fact, the violence in this film was so bad, that it influenced many "copycat" killers who shaved their heads and went on killing sprees around their hometown.
Mother's Shame Factor: 8

#2 Caligula
Plot: This film tells the story of Rome's most infamous emperor-- Caligula. His life seems stranger than fiction, and it is hard to separate the legend from fact-- but then again, maybe that's what draws us to his character.
Why It's Bad, Bad, Bad: Three words for you: unsimulated sex scenes. In other words, all of the sex scenes that were filmed in this movie, even the infamous "Roman orgy" scene were real. Real people, having real sex, in front of the camera...and it's not called porn.
Mother's Shame Factor: 10+ (This is a real bad one kiddies. Stay away.)

#1 Rosemary's Baby
Plot: Rosemary and Guy have new neighbors-- oh, and they happen to be a cult of Satanists. Oh, and did I mention that they're planning on her unborn baby to become the Antichrist?
Why It's Bad, Bad, Bad: This movie freaked everybody out in the 60's. Even the clergy. In fact, it was denounced by the Catholic Church. Talk about controversy.
Mother's Shame Factor: Meh, it's mild compared to the others. I'll give it a five.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Rosemary's Baby.... Really?.. sorry but gotta disagree on that one.. and real sex on camera is definitely called porn... sorry you no i got to give my constructive criticism.. dont get mad..

ladyhornet_05 said...

When it's unsimulated sex done by professional actors, and it's backed up with a reasonable plot it's called "artistic eroticism." Seriously. Good example of this is the film "In the Realm of the Senses" a 1976 Japanese-made film. Its actually very reminiscent of Takishi Miike, so you'd probably like it.